#47: Decimal

Everyone calls me 2.3. I guess that means my surname is point three, but I am still unsure if there needs to be a hyphen in there somewhere. I'm still coming to terms with the fuck up.

Don't get me wrong, I fucked up. Well, I fucked up first, and then the lady at the Department of Births, Deaths and Marriages didn't read over what I'd written, so she compounded the fuck up by authorising it. So, I legally changed my name from Gareth Hughes to 2.3.

I didn't have my reading glasses on me, so everything looked small and squiggly. And where I should have put my new name, I put my driver's licence number. So my driver’s licence is now garethhughes. A lot easier to remember than 2,378,587.

Well, yeah, that's a good point. My surname might me Millions, and then my middle name is point three. But, I never put the word million on the form, so, I don't think my surname is Millions.

It would be the coolest surname out there. Only beaten by Billions and Trillions.

I will change it, but you have to wait six months between name changes. Even if it was a fuck up.

No, I wasn't drunk. I told you I had forgotten my reading glasses.

The woman? At the department? Not sure. It was after five and she was itching to get out of there, so she wasn't interested in prolonging the whole thing. So I walked out as a decimal.